Ich bin ein Berliner

July 2, 2008 8:12 PM +1 GMT

I feel like death. I haven’t slept in a verrry long time. My blood has been replaced with coffee. I just finished taking my first hobo-bath in a pay-toilet (,50 euro). I do however feel much better about myself, considering I was on the verge of shitting my pants searching for a washroom – thank you girl at gas station who spoke very bad, I mean cute, broken English, you got me safely to the nearest S-Bahn which in turn led to my McDonald’s heaven. Those golden arches actually look like a giant upside-down ass in the sky now that I think about it. Weird.

I’m pretty sure I clocked in over 20 miles of walking today. I’m done. Cooked. Need to sleep. Only I’m not sure if I can get away sleeping here in the Ostbahnhof Station waiting for my train. It doesn’t arrive for another 8 hours, and I don’t know if they close or not. Either way, I should probably go find a beer somewhere. That is one thing I have yet to do since I arrived this morning. Oh oh oh. Awesome luck. So I’m at the Berlin Airport this morning and I’m just hanging outside smoking a cigarette for literally 30 seconds trying to figure out how I’m going to get downtown (didn’t look like one could just walk out of the airport) when this little beat-to-shit bumper car or whatever, thing was the size of a Powerwheels, pulls up right in front of me. Out pops an older gent, I’m guessing late 50’s, smoking a cigarette as well and sort of walks into the Airport, but sees me and kindly approaches and starts up a conversation asking if I was just enjoying a cigarette before my flight (which I thought he might be doing as well). Told him I just got in. Explained my situation, what I was doing. He thought it was cool and offered a ride anywhere in the city for 10 euro. I thought it over and agreed and hopped in. Stefen was his name-o. Cool ass dood. We talked in broken English and German for close to 30 minutes, gave me his number and told me to call if I needed anything at all while I was in the country. Talk about a welcome wagon. Just what I wanted to find. We parted ways at Zoologischer Garten Berlin and I was on my way.

I toured the Zoo, one of the largest in Germany, and remembered to my dismay that I had a camera in my rucksack the moment I walked through the EXIT gate on my way out. Idiot. I really need to work on my picture taking. Oh well, I’ll have to go back before I leave. Let’s see, other than that, I tried arranging cheap rides to Dresden all day, found a website that lets you plug in where you’re at and where you’re going and voila, it pops up with names and numbers to call. Only problem is, none of them speak a lick ‘o English, and my horrible German isn’t enough to properly understand and arrange a meeting place, time, etc. Most of these guys just got pissed off at me and hung up. Don’t blame them. Imagine Muhammad Algabara calling you up and rambling in your ear about hitching a ride with you. Ummmmm, yea. Fun times. I felt defeated so I tried to call Stefen, but, here’s the zinger….he only gave me 7 digits! Phone numbers here are at least 10 on average. Fuck. There went that idea. Frustrated, I decided to decipher the U-Bahn subway system and ride around all day. I got a pretty good handle on it (actually similar in setup to New York) and then moved above ground to the S-Bahn trains. I zigzagged around for a while and ended up here at Ostbahnhof Station. I’d love to write more, and I will, but I really need a cigarette (4 euros a pack, not bad).

Sehr müde…

Ken

PS – I broke down and signed up for 30 days of T-Mobile Hotspot access. Just so I can keep in touch with all of you assholes. Yes I miss you already, get over yourselves. Another 30 euros down the drain. DAY ONE TOTAL - ~120 euros. This is gonna get ridiculous. Feel free to send Paypal Donations to Kenneth.j.carter@gmail.com . No – really.